Evo Recap: Most crowded EVO yet. Fans assaulting John in and out of the bathroom. Mason mentioned the Hash House. Fried chicken on top of biscuits on top of bacon on top of spaghetti. Too tore for two people! Renic fell in love with a random swedish guy who gave him free beer and did his dishes.
SBO Qualifiers: MrFanatiq got stomped in UMvC3 by some surprisingly tough competition. Better luck next time.
Game Review: Lollipop Chainsaw, lollipop naughtiness. Think Michael Jackson’s Moonwalker, Strawberry Shortcake and Final Fight. Stream monsters recommended it, but no necrophilia on cheerleader action. 4/10
Music Choice of the Week: “My Feelings For You” – For the gamer girls in YOUR lives.
Fun Dip Tips: Make the ladies happy, but it takes practice. Stick, powder, girl, regret, repeat.
Foreign slang of the week: The new “One Night Stand” – ‘Fuck and Chuck’
Ex-Girlfriend Yard Sale: Shogo needs to make that Evo money back. Renic’s new Sport’s Jacket. Fresh Tampons- sorry, Maxipads. #OderOfWhore. Renic sized two-piece string bikini. John’s signature with every purchase!
Coming Soon: We’re going to document our progress in Ultimate Marvel vs Capcom 3! Stay tuned to AskDrSubZero.com for more information.
Q. Tyrone: Would you fuck renic with a strapon?
A. Um, Shogs, take it a way…
Q. Mr Wolf: I cybered my first girl the other day, and I got her to send me some dirty picks. What’s the nastiest thing you’ve gotten a girl to do over the internet.
A. Got a girl in Jersey to show me a dildo.. or was it a cucumber? I bailed out, not before telling her ‘I love her.’
Q. Tyrone: If you were president for a week, what would you do?
A. First order of business – Ban breast reductions. Period. I am the guardian of tits!
Q. Jor: Favorite Street Fighter Theme? Favorite video game of all time?
A: Circuit, for Hugo for sure. How can I pick just one? Klax for TurboGrafx-16 is tore up.
Q. Jay Born FU: Stranded on a deserted island and the only availabl ebathroom was Renic’s mouth, would you poop your pants or feed the shit-maw on Renic’s face?
A. JohnD: “….” Renic: “…what?!”
Q. “How come you’re named the most successful man in the world?”
A. It’s got a good roll to it – a man’s name. Originally used to troll, but it stuck.
Q. “Tier list of past guests?”
A. That’s a big task. Top guest – “L.I. Joe.” PyroLee and Aris were high tier.
Worst? Ashley Stone… tough times.
Q. Paru: “How many hoes have you slammed with Gootecks?”
A. One was in the running. Thought better of it. Street Fighter was more entertaining at the time.
Q. Ether: “Renic, did you at least blow the swedish guy?”
A. Why? He’s the one who did the dishes for free.
Q. Ether: “Why so many white people on this show?”
A. Renic can’t leave the house in fear of black people?… or something like that… Don’t know, wasn’t paying atteniton.
Q. FactsRFacts: “Jonah Falcon or Buck Angel?”
A. Renic is gay… wait, what?! 0.o
Q. Fuse4Spence: “Doc, if you came out with your own brand of tapon, what would you choose for a brand name, and would renic get a discount?”
A. What else? The ‘StayTore-pon..’ or ‘Tampons Uhhnn!!’ Coupon code: “RenicGay”
Q. YOURenicSUCKS: “Doc, what ethnicity do you prefer your woman to be???”
A. I love all women!
Q. Zantua: “Give us your best impression of Mark ‘Jesus Freak’ Biceps”
A. Renic is gay… seriously, what happened on tonight’s show??
tags: lollipop chainsaw, zombies, necrophilia, tampons, maxipads, marvel, hash house, evo, vegas, swedish, sweden, umvc3, gamer girls, fun dip, jonah falcon, buck angel, renicgay, fuck and chuck, oderofwhore, li joe, sherryjenix, mrfanatiq, pryolee, aris,